If you have been keeping up and read my last blog post you can probably figure out where I have been all this time. I have pulled back a lot from social media this last month or so. I haven't updated any video blogs or anything. I felt I needed a break to work on myself and my health. I will be going in for some blood tests to check my cholesterol and all the basic tests. Hopefully now that I am down a bit over 20 lbs my blood pressure should be stabilizing. I have been back to my six days a week workouts. Some days it is a struggle to get moving. Coming out the other side of the cancer fight does not mean you are back to normal. Getting cancer and going through chemotherapy and then 20 rounds of radiation takes a toll on your body. It's almost like someone pressed pause on my life and I am still waiting for someone to press play.
Most people think just because you got the good news that you have beat cancer your life snaps right back into place. Sure I heard the words and "BAM" everything went right back to normal. Now that my friends is comical. I have unfortunately some long lasting side effects from my treatments. As of right now I can't see very well. My eye site has been affected. I have a hard time seeing at night more than anything. I have been experiencing migraines from the eye strain. Can’t wait for my eye doctor appointment next week to get a handle on this and get myself some new glasses. The chemo messed up my teeth and after seeing the dentist last week I have to have some fillings refilled. The three fillings I had popped out from the radiation. One tooth broke completely so that has to be pulled.
Thank god that is it. It's a hassle at best and at least I am alive to have these issues. Got to look on the bright side of things for sure. Is it hard to not be upset about this shit? Of course it is. I am only human and coming out the other side of cancer is still a lifelong lasting effect. As sick as it sounds having cancer and going through treatment gives you a purpose. All the tests and treatments along with the doctor’s appointments. You now have a fight on your hands for your life. You focus and your life is now a series of very important appointments to be kept. You wrap your whole life into one purpose. Once that is over you look around and say "now what?" As I said before you are waiting for someone to just press play so your life can just move on. In reality you are lost and you struggle to move forward. Those who have had this disease or have been a caregiver to a loved one can understand. With a newfound purpose I keep pushing forward every day. No matter how hard it is somedays.
One of the things that have been helping me keep my focus is riding my bicycle in the evening. It's becoming a pain in the ass because I can't see too far ahead but it has been a good time to clear my mind and have some peace. There is this man I see every day in a straw hat. I call him Jim. Looks like a Jim to me. We say hi every day I pass his house. It started the first day I rode by because he had his sprinkler going. And of course as you’re riding your bike down the sidewalk you know you're going to get sprayed with water. I try to go at least twice a day on my ride. It has been so nice out that doing cardio in the gym seems like a waste. So I do my forty five minutes of weightlifting and off I go to ride my bike for cardio. So the first time of course I think to myself "this motherfucker and his sprinkler."
It's on every day and I have been riding past this guy’s house twice a day almost every day. The point is that it took the man in the straw hat to show me really how simple life can be. I mean this guy loves his lawn. Either he is watering it or cutting it. Some days he's just out there watching the grass grow. Obviously as his sprinkler waters the lawn. How simple life can be to just focus on the simple things. No shits given to all the assholes, the shit talkers and the drama that surrounds so many people. Just focus on what makes you happy. Even if it is as simple as grass.
Well that is about it for now. I will be back with my youtube vids soon. I am glad you guys enjoy the videos. The last few weeks I just have been focused on other things. I do the food videos for fun. When I have time and feel like it there will be more. After all I do those for fun and give out some info. Remember find your happiness and peace. Don't be an asshole.
SMIB \m/
SMIB \m/
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well said brother. btw, still trying to free up a day for that sushi, should be open soon. also, went on my road trip and went to that old church in new mexico, not sure if u remember but its where that holy dirt is. i brought some back for you, it was quite the spiritual; experience man, it has gotten me back to going to church after soooo many years away. anyway, ill hit u up soon man, keep up the hard work
ReplyDeleteAwesome man!! I remember. Thanks for that! Let me know when you're free we will destroy sushi lol
DeleteYour welcome and LMFAO, YES! Fuck those fish up!!
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