Today was day one back in the gym. So what do I decide to do? Legs. Yes, Like a dumb ass I went right for legs. That's ok I just won't be able to walk tomorrow. Who needs to walk anyway, right? Still I took it easy as far as how much weight I used. I kept my same routine and just hit it. It did feel very weird being back. I had to struggle with some fear that I would get anxiety. I actually waited for it. It never came so that was good. After a while I just started to enjoy my workout and by the end when I was on the treadmill doing my cardio I felt very comfortable like I have never left. It will take time to get back to where I was and I just need to focus on what I need to do.
The rest of it will all take care of itself. I am in a good place mentally at this point that I am able to just stay in the moment. I have to keep my mind off all this cancer shit until I know what the plan is to move forward. Right now my plan is just to start getting my life back on track where I was before all this started. If radiation is the next step to help me, then so be it. When the time comes, it comes. I have learned a few important things during all this. The one thing that really is important is just keeping calm and learning what all the options are before you act. I have grown a lot having gone through this. I can see the change with my attitude though my blogs. Over time things will work themselves out no matter what they are.
Everyday things are getting better. My focus is on getting back my strength and just recovering from six months of chemo. My side effects have been so minor. I still feel fatigue. It's not horrible but it is there. The feeling like I am cooking from the inside out is still creeping up here and there. My super sniffer is almost gone. I still catch that chemo smell here and there. There is something in my bathroom that still gets me. It will be gone in time. All I really have that really pisses me off is all the muscle pain and soreness. The sitting around for all this time has taken it's toll on my body. Thank god I started working out a few years ago because this would have been so much harder if I didn't.
SMIB \m/
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