Here we are, the last day of the year. I obviously will not be writing tomorrow. I actually hope to have a few drinks and try to put this last year behind me. When I think back to the first five months of the year. A whole lot of things were going on. Who knew I would be diagnosed with cancer. Not exactly the way to start the summer. Although I had to go through this. It has changed me in ways I had no idea it would. Some good some bad. Mostly good though. I am ready to start to put this behind me. I have a great feeling that the next step in this battle will be positive one.
This new year I have my own battles to win. I Have a new focus on so many aspects of my life that really nothing gets to me. I have to work hard on my meditation and keeping my anxiety at a low volume. I know my anxiety triggers. As everyone who has anxiety knows that is the first thing you try to do. Find out those triggers and avoid them or learn to deal with them head on. I have figured out a few things that have worked for me. Although the majority of my anxiety is thinking I am about to die on the spot. It is hard to try to avoid that. So I deal with it head on. Well I try to lol.
Meditation along with acupuncture has been helping. Still these feeling sneak in. Today I finally started to work on what was the next step to my whole workout plan before I was diagnosed back in May. I started to learn Tai Chi. I am just working on video lessons for now, but I have to say it was very cool and really calmed me down. I am excited to keep that going and learn way more. Like I said I was ready to start working with it back in May before I got sick. No better time than now. Just time to move along and not let cancer define who I am and what I can and can't do. Realizing that I am still detoxing from six months of chemo drugs and antibiotics, steroids and so on. I can feel it and I still get run down at the end of the day. As usual I try to do more than I can but that is just how I am. I can't stand not getting it all done.
I am as ready as I can be to move into the new year and start to get my life back together. I have to ride this road for two years before I will know if this cancer will never come back. That is a long time to wait. I have to keep my mind off if it. How? I have no idea. I am working on it! Sticking with my workouts and stretching and now Tai Chi I will stay on track. I have learned that you can only fix what you are in control of. You are in control of what you eat and working out. Everything else is out of your hands. I guess when people say "tomorrow you can walk outside and get hit by a bus" they are right.
Well as we come to a close to 2015 all I can say is that it has been one hell of a year. I missed a whole lot this year and I will never forget what an impact that has had on me. I know it is said so many times and just gets lost as background noise, but never let a day go by without making things count. Do what you want everyday. Fuck the rest and who gives a shit what anyone says or thinks of you. Have a Happy New Year! Stay safe no matter where you are.
SMIB \m/
This new year I have my own battles to win. I Have a new focus on so many aspects of my life that really nothing gets to me. I have to work hard on my meditation and keeping my anxiety at a low volume. I know my anxiety triggers. As everyone who has anxiety knows that is the first thing you try to do. Find out those triggers and avoid them or learn to deal with them head on. I have figured out a few things that have worked for me. Although the majority of my anxiety is thinking I am about to die on the spot. It is hard to try to avoid that. So I deal with it head on. Well I try to lol.
Meditation along with acupuncture has been helping. Still these feeling sneak in. Today I finally started to work on what was the next step to my whole workout plan before I was diagnosed back in May. I started to learn Tai Chi. I am just working on video lessons for now, but I have to say it was very cool and really calmed me down. I am excited to keep that going and learn way more. Like I said I was ready to start working with it back in May before I got sick. No better time than now. Just time to move along and not let cancer define who I am and what I can and can't do. Realizing that I am still detoxing from six months of chemo drugs and antibiotics, steroids and so on. I can feel it and I still get run down at the end of the day. As usual I try to do more than I can but that is just how I am. I can't stand not getting it all done.
I am as ready as I can be to move into the new year and start to get my life back together. I have to ride this road for two years before I will know if this cancer will never come back. That is a long time to wait. I have to keep my mind off if it. How? I have no idea. I am working on it! Sticking with my workouts and stretching and now Tai Chi I will stay on track. I have learned that you can only fix what you are in control of. You are in control of what you eat and working out. Everything else is out of your hands. I guess when people say "tomorrow you can walk outside and get hit by a bus" they are right.
Well as we come to a close to 2015 all I can say is that it has been one hell of a year. I missed a whole lot this year and I will never forget what an impact that has had on me. I know it is said so many times and just gets lost as background noise, but never let a day go by without making things count. Do what you want everyday. Fuck the rest and who gives a shit what anyone says or thinks of you. Have a Happy New Year! Stay safe no matter where you are.
SMIB \m/
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