I suffered last night with the most horrible migraine. This thing plagued me all night and into the morning. I really didn't get much sleep at all. Today I honestly didn't have any other side effects from the chemo besides that steroids constantly making me hungry and the migraine that was it. Being tired is a give in this early in the week. So that is always there. Honestly this feeling of hunger this time around is so crazy. It is worse that usual. The acupuncture helped my migraine so I have some relief. Just need to manage the hunger before I slap some BBQ sauce on my car and eat the whole thing.
The closer I get to the end of treatment the harder it is to recover. This first week after chemo is the hardest I have to deal with. that old cliche of being tired of being tired is so true. I am so sick of just sitting here on my ass. It seams like I say this every other week. Once I get chemo it's the same old song and dance. Tired and feeling like shit. Every one that passes it just gets worse. Well that's all I have. No grand views of the world or life changing outlooks. Just the same bullshit as yesterday. Angry and pissed off that this happened. No explanation no nothing. I sit here and think about that doctor telling me "It's bad luck" Nothing you can do but move forward and stop dwelling on how and why it happened.
Well no dwelling on the past. I have to stay focused on the future. I need to remind myself this everyday. It is easy to stop and start looking back and wonder why. No need to keep getting angry. But still I will do it anyway. Staying positive and trying, Lord knows I am trying every day to just get through the hardest part of the chemo this week.
SMIB \m/
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