We believe in God, Allah, Buddha, Odin and Thor, Ancient Aliens and some even Gene Simmons as the God of Thunder. well I was raised a good Italian Catholic boy. I have had my faith shaken more than a number of times in my life. Whatever your beliefs are I do not judge nor do I push anyone towards any religion. Times like these they say you tend to find your faith. I believe there is a grand architect of all things who has some master plan for the universe. we are put here to do good and become better men and women by having faith that we as a people, as a species can bond together and help each other at a time of need. I have seen that faith in my family and friends. I just want to open this post with a thank you to everyone who has that faith, whether from God or Gene Simmons lol Thanks for that Faith in me. so before this turns into a Stryper song, on with my day.
So another day to log in the books. I woke up tired because I did so much yesterday. But yesterday since the chemo started I finally felt like I was normal. going to the gym and working out felt great. my dam muscles are so sore today and I love that feeling. And then hanging out and working with my Idol, come on that was amazing. Just being able to talk shop with him was fucking amazing. Watching the show and just feeling the music move through me. The drums and bass just beating inside you. well unless you love music I do not expect you to understand that feeling. And just those few minuets on stage playing guitar, that made me feel alive. Ah, what an awesome day.
But by the time I left and got in the car for my ride home I was beat. Just felt tired again.
Got some good sleep non the less and woke up with Fathers Day breakfast in bed, How nice my daughter orchestrated that because she believes its amazing to have breakfast in bed. So amazing that she had to jump in and have her pancake breakfast in bed with me lol Got to love it. So a very awesome breakfast and just rested today I was pretty out of it with this dam chemo brain that has been plaguing me on and off for days. I feel like at times I will lose control of the structure I had set in my everyday shit. I need to stay on the norm just to get my mind straight. I think that's part of this whole fight. People say fight, be strong stay positive, but I dot think I really knew what that meant until now. I am learning something new about myself. About my limits mentally and that is being pushed far now only because of the anticipation of the unknown.
I am at least for now happy that I have had no nausea today. My strength is back and I feel much better. I think yesterday was just a long ass day for me up early at the gym then right off to the club by 3 pm was just a lot but well worth it. Going on from here I hope that the next week before my next treatment I will have more strength and try to get back on track with my schedule. At this point I am learning the meaning of "Fight" I realize that this thing is trying to change me and beat me to submission into believing it has power over me. I have been struggling with that I will not lie. It has gotten the best of me some days. But I realize now that I am worth more than that to myself and that I can not let this beat me into someone I am not.
That's all for today. Keep the faith.
SMIB \m/
So another day to log in the books. I woke up tired because I did so much yesterday. But yesterday since the chemo started I finally felt like I was normal. going to the gym and working out felt great. my dam muscles are so sore today and I love that feeling. And then hanging out and working with my Idol, come on that was amazing. Just being able to talk shop with him was fucking amazing. Watching the show and just feeling the music move through me. The drums and bass just beating inside you. well unless you love music I do not expect you to understand that feeling. And just those few minuets on stage playing guitar, that made me feel alive. Ah, what an awesome day.
But by the time I left and got in the car for my ride home I was beat. Just felt tired again.
Got some good sleep non the less and woke up with Fathers Day breakfast in bed, How nice my daughter orchestrated that because she believes its amazing to have breakfast in bed. So amazing that she had to jump in and have her pancake breakfast in bed with me lol Got to love it. So a very awesome breakfast and just rested today I was pretty out of it with this dam chemo brain that has been plaguing me on and off for days. I feel like at times I will lose control of the structure I had set in my everyday shit. I need to stay on the norm just to get my mind straight. I think that's part of this whole fight. People say fight, be strong stay positive, but I dot think I really knew what that meant until now. I am learning something new about myself. About my limits mentally and that is being pushed far now only because of the anticipation of the unknown.
I am at least for now happy that I have had no nausea today. My strength is back and I feel much better. I think yesterday was just a long ass day for me up early at the gym then right off to the club by 3 pm was just a lot but well worth it. Going on from here I hope that the next week before my next treatment I will have more strength and try to get back on track with my schedule. At this point I am learning the meaning of "Fight" I realize that this thing is trying to change me and beat me to submission into believing it has power over me. I have been struggling with that I will not lie. It has gotten the best of me some days. But I realize now that I am worth more than that to myself and that I can not let this beat me into someone I am not.
That's all for today. Keep the faith.
SMIB \m/
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